don't look, then leap

Admittedly, I am failing miserably at my goal of becoming a better blogger. What can I say though? I'm a college student that has hundreds of things I should be doing and thousands of things that I'd rather do instead. Yeah, surprise surprise.

This semester however, is the first time in a very long time that I have been able to "focus only on school" which, for better or for worse, has been quite the change. Last semester, I found myself working 40+ hours a week in Salt Lake which required the 2 hour roundtrip commute time. Let's just say working and going to school full-time while i was also supposed to be semi-managing a club was less than ideal. It went like this:

You have these options:
- work
- school
- social life
- sleep

Now pick two.

Well, I can say one thing for sure, sleep was always the first option eliminated and work was an obligation that I couldn't just opt out of. I wish I could say that I chose wisely with what was left but, that would be a lie.

So. I quit my job. Despite the fact that I heavily depended on the income, I took a giant (blind) leap of faith and now, here I am--with rapidly diminishing funds and a new found love for school. Without a doubt, I made the right choice. I just hope that sooner or later, i will grab hold of something in the form of a concrete plan for a secure future and thus end the leap of faith that is starting to make my stomach turn.

Am I worried? No. Should I be? Probably, but there's something enjoyable about living in the uncertainty and relative chaos that I have come to know as my life.

"But I don’t want comfort. I want God, I want poetry, I want real danger, I want freedom, I want goodness. I want sin."  

-BRAVE NEW WORLD, ALDOUS HUXLEY